Published on: 25 May 03:22

Cameron asks

struggling to get a job. what are some alternative ways to make some money

My answer

A few other responders here have suggested blowjobs. I'd like to throw my support behind this. But, like, the other way around. Charge folks for the PRIVILEGE of sucking yours. How? Easy. There are all kinds of methods for squiffy-ify-ing one's penis up into such deliciousness and radiance and exquisiteness that thirsting fellators and/or fellatrices will queue for miles for a treasured few sublime slurps. Here's a trick I find works wonders: simply get ten thousand priests to bless an arbitrary humongous volume of water. An Olympic swimming pool should do nicely. Attract the ten thousand priests by announcing an aquajogging-themed Vatican III or something (a follow-up to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Vatican_Council), kidnap the Pope, hurl him in the deep end, broadcast pleading over the facility's speaker system that if all ten thousand whip out their crucifixes and crank out some bless-bless-blessing, the en-holied water might just buoy His Holiness to aquajoggey safety. Once the Olympic pool is suffused with ten thousand pious blessings, concentrate it. Boil it. Either the old-fashioned way, by heating it, or by transporting the entire pool and contents to the top of Mt. Everest, whichever seems less effort or more entertaining. It's like reducing a simmer-sauce, yeah? Who's not done that? Easy. Continue until the ten thousand blessings are concentrated down into a liquid litre. Pure bottled lightning. And remove the priests and Pope before the rendering. Unless any would like to, as they say, take one for the team.

Now marinate your cock in it. Who'd ever resist saying no to a gobble on that? I may be straight as the day as long, but even I'd be shouting "make way for Lord Sugar-Throat!" Resist the most blessed dick in Christendom? No way. Maybe that's where https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Creator/BrianBlessed got his name, and what powers his voice. Finally, gatecrash a billionaires' tax haven or something, and let the moola roll in. Problem solved.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/393804108644865/po...