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Consent is sexy❤

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9 Mar 2026
NSFW Shite Advice
Today's TERRIBLE advice: how George Foreman being an oafish piece of ...
Pat and/or Mohammed Ali asks after sleeping with my mistress and going three rounds last night..,, i am as sore as hell ,.. and now my girlfriend is planning a romantic night tonight with fireplace and all,.. how do i avoid sex ...
23 Feb 2026
NSFW Whimsy
Sexyverse book cover design contest gets seriously molten
[First written in March 2023, and I'd only just now realised I'd not posted this! Posting now:] Slightly naughty content ahead! I’ve been banging out a series of stories, and the time has come to publish. That means neat cover ...
23 Feb 2026
NSFW Shite Advice
Today's TERRIBLE advice: on protecting your front bottom from ...
Merry asks Husband is fairly well endowed, definitely above average. He’s always been able to put a hurting on that kitty. I lost a bunch of weight and now the kitty is more accessible and doesn’t have any cushion in the way. He ...
27 Jan 2026
NSFW Shite Advice
Today's TERRIBLE advice: on relieving one's gay anxieties via ...
Gino asks How to stop being self-conscious about being g@y? My answer Dude! Isn't it obvious? Just provoke every single person, object and abstract concept in the entire universe into becoming even gayer than you. Here's what you ...
21 Jan 2026
NSFW Shite Advice
Today's TERRIBLE advice: the sublime wisdom of blending ...
Tifani asks got this text today from someone i’ve been seeing (2 dates), what do? My answer It's ... it's obvious, isn't it? You two lovebirds simply need to close your relative Slut Gap, pronto, via galactic quantities of mutual ...
13 Jan 2026
NSFW Shite Advice
Today's TERRIBLE advice: on obsoleting all car locksmiths via ...
A valiant early attempt at blending cars with domiciles. Incidentally, turns out it's really difficult getting decent-quality photos of cars crashing into houses. You'd be astonished how little stock photography there is of such ...
16 Dec 2025
NSFW Shite Advice
Why pirates despise anthropomorphising hen-party bananas
Chris asks My family is upset with my purchase shown, and want me to get rid of him… Instead I’m thinking about becoming a pirate. Any leads? My answer Maybe the reason your fellow parrots are so upset with you purchasing that ...
13 Dec 2025
NSFW Shite Advice
The surprising advantages of romancing the STDs themselves
Image source: https://www.oglaf.com/gifted2/, seriously, it's amazing, read both this and its part 2 and also its prequel Andrew asks I got a vasectomy so I could have a bunch of unprotected sex with no consequences but I've been to ...
13 Dec 2025
NSFW Shite Advice
"I routinely redline the neurons of every bloke in the postcode, ask ...
Rachel asks Bf is upset I don’t wear makeup around him, what do? My answer Tell him "What the hell are you talking about? I'd always worn quite staggering quantities of makeup. Really shit makeup, too. Make myself uglier. I ...
13 Dec 2025
NSFW Shite Advice
How to delight your Thanksgiving roses
Jasper asks Since Thanksgiving this is the second time I've shit myself late at night. What do? My answer What's the problem? Poo is a fantastic fertiliser. Your roses won't know what hit 'em. Shit yourself with greater ...
17 Aug 2025
NSFW Whimsy
"What’s the most hilariously wrong thing you believed about sex when ...
When I was a boy, around 8-10 years old, I'd heard about sex but had almost no idea what sex actually involved. Apparently girls have this Thing called a vagina? And apparently my dick goes into it? Somehow? How? At age 8, I'd also ...
12 Aug 2025
NSFW Shite Advice
Five quintillion chlamydias in a trench coat
Brad asks Getting lucky tonight after 3 year divorce. Told her I hit the gym 5 days a week. I lied. Got a dad bod. What do? My answer A few ideas: Tell her you'd "hit" the gym as in physically collided with it en route to ...
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