Published on: 26 Feb 09:38

Alice asks

My deadbeat dad blocked me, what should I do to retaliate?

My answer

Simple. Create nineteen million fake dating-app profiles and gaslight him with unbelievable thoroughness. Orchestrate his dozens and hundreds of dating-app matches with cross-match conversations. Make every match mention every other match. Everyone knows each other, everyone knows him. Have every match tell him that there's a certain man and/or woman about town called Alice who they all think is just peachy and super and fab, and if he can just find it within his heart to think twice about his blocking, all nineteen million will give him the most thorough, sensual blowjob ever performed.

You know how certain porn videos depict three ladies all performing a blowjob on a single gent? Bah. A piffly three? Three is nothing. You've not lived until you've experienced a nineteen-million-lady blowjob. And neither has he. Really. Naturally he will thrum and burst with frantic excitement. Tell him all nineteen million of you ache and thirst to burst him, so won't he please please come to a certain address?

That address is the location of the next https://wplsummit.org/. For those not in the know, it's an annual-ish convention of every female political leader in the world. Instruct him from nineteen million directions that ladies worldwide hunger for steely strength, and nothing turns us lady-leaders on like boldness and assertiveness. All he must do is stride through the Summit's front doors like a masculine colossus, head held high, and declare in a loud, clear voice that he will grant permission for every Leader-Of-Tomorrow to perform upon him the world's most colossal nineteen-million-way group blowjob. That'll do the trick.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/393804108644865/po...