Published on: 16 Apr 23:20

Strumpets! STRUMPETS!

Jimmy asks

What is the best way to jump on a fast moving train? I always wanted to try this!

My answer

It's a well-kept secret that all trains are inflatable and springy, like bouncy castles. And sexually submissive. They adore being shown who's boss, the stronger the better. Pop off to Japan or China or wherever has the fastest trains these days. Purchase a racing motorbike, ride it onto the nearest hyper-tech maglev tracks, wait until the next train comes along, then gun the motor, hit the bike's top speed, and headbutt the oncoming train like you're headlining a death metal gig.

It'll bounce and squish away from your mighty mighty cranium and flounce into the sky. Hop aboard and ride that inflatable submissive bastard like a LotR eagle. Result!

Source: https://www.facebook.com/groups/393804108644865/po...