NSFW

Writing insane crap is seriously underrated.

Consent is sexy❤

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NSFW Shite Advice
Did the SMASH in HULK SMASH mean sex all along?
8 Nov 2021
Moodyi asks ways to hint her that you want to smash My answer Smash? Waaaitasec, when the Incredible Hulk had roared HULK SMASH about twenty thousand times over the last several decad...
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Ten thousand packets of anti-moisture granules: tampon perfection
8 Nov 2021
Karra asks My . decided to come a week early. What's a good substitute for tampons? My answer Ten thousand packets of those anti-moisture granule things you get in capsule bottles. Sho...
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Extreme-right politics gets me really HOT
8 Nov 2021
Susanna asks What kind of favors can I use men on tinder for? I was thinking of picking one up tomorrow to help me assemble an ikea furniture that I can't put together by myself. What el...
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Shoot off your balls a thousand times for science
8 Nov 2021
Eli asks What should I think that happened? ETA - people, I know about IVF. I am looking for bad, funny explanations. My answer There was an American Civil War urban legend about a sp...
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Humongous sex drive
8 Nov 2021
Sydney asks how to avoid getting pregnant? My answer Are you male or female? Normally I wouldn't ask, but boy, you should meet my girlfriend. If there's any woman with such a humongous...
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The intermediate anus of daring and vigorous ambition
8 Nov 2021
Elizabeth asks I’m getting major surgery on my throat on Monday. I want to spend my last day eating whatever I want because I won’t be eating much for a few weeks.. What shall I eat??? ...
NSFW Shite Advice
The most abysmal paramour I've ever met
8 Nov 2021
Winter asks I'm so hot people keep hitting on me everywhere I go -- my dentist, the cinema usher, random passers by, my boyfriend's father... But not my boyfriend What do? My answer ...
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Actual literal sex trophies
8 Nov 2021
Yasmin asks I got 30 minutes of sleep last night because of the sex trophies I have no coffee. How do I stay awake long enough to keep them alive til their dad gets off work? My answ...
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Menstruation is groß as in great
8 Nov 2021
Tricia asks My male friend says periods are gross. How should i convince him that they aren't? My answer Are you certain he didn't say "groß"? For those who don't know, that's the Germ...
NSFW Shite Advice
A particularly irresistible baby brother
8 Nov 2021
Ashley asks My toddler told me last year I had a baby sister in my belly. She also told her teacher she (the teacher) had a baby in her belly. Turns out, both allegations were correct....
NSFW Shite Advice
How to feel Joy
8 Nov 2021
Lydia asks My depression has been extra spicy lately. What can I do to feel any joy?! My answer Feel Joy? My traditional go-to, and this may work for you as well, has been to fon...
NSFW Shite Advice
The worst porno in the world
8 Nov 2021
Noah asks I want to make a p0rn. What should the title and theme be? My answer Don't just film people shagging. Any old chump can do that. That's old hat. Boring cliché. Do the opposit...
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