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Whimsy
San Francisco Redwood City: about as rural as Coruscant
5 Jul 2023
San Francisco is hot! This part of it, Redwood City, has some seriously large houses. I ran https://www.strava.com/activities/9381378172 earlier this morning, before it got too roasting. I ...
Whimsy
Progenitor of the Bashful Bumhole
5 Jul 2023
CW: 50ftcl.it/baby-poo Being pooed on apparently signifies respect and reverence and prestige unparalleled! Or so I hear. I'm in San Francisco. I'm meeting my delightful wee nephew Caleb f...
Whimsy
Midjourney, Mk. I
24 Jun 2023
I've been faffing around with midjourney.com. For those who don't know, it's an AI image generator. You input a text-prompt description of the kind o image you'd like, and it does its damnd...
NSFW Shite Advice
How to seduce Annatar, Lord of Fab
10 Jun 2023
Image source: https://lieutenant-of-darkness.tumblr.com/post/158... SkiSakima asks I got psychosis and scared almost everyone away what do My answer Isn't it obvious? Just r...
Shite Advice
How to become an Astroturf-esque Judge Judy
8 May 2023
Jennifer asks My boyfriend is locked up waiting for his court dates. The lawyer we hired stopped responding I looked him up and the LAWYER is up for some very serious charges that just ...
Shite Advice
How to make the Vomit Comet even more romantic
8 May 2023
Meg asks Apparently no one likes to cuddle with me because my arms and legs are heavy. Plus, my fat stomach feels like a “heavy bowling ball” against their body. What do? My answer Ugh...
Shite Advice
Punctuality is the politeness of bratty bratty princesses
27 Apr 2023
Kaylah asks I transferred to a new location for my work and my new boss lectured me for clocking in a minute late a few times. I feel so bad that my tardiness is causing issues at my jo...
Shite Advice
The classic "whaddaya MEAN ya can't paint red lights green" defence
27 Apr 2023
Rhett asks I'm tired of stoplights taking too long to change for me. Half the time, they change for no reason and give the ghost traffic in the turning lane, a green arrow. How do I sho...
Shite Advice
The swimmiest flatulence cure you've ever encountered
27 Apr 2023
Justyce asks I am full of gas. It's so bad that it hurts. What can I do to relieve the pressure?? My answer Why not go swimming at the bottom of the Mariana Trench? It's 11km deep. You...
NSFW
Bet you couldn't marry a frumpy dullard like Amber Heard
24 Apr 2023
Ashley asks 2 day stay in hospital caused $52k bill, what do? My answer There is a saying among banks and other money lenders: "If someone owes you a million dollars, that's a them-pro...
NSFW Shite Advice
Why no train driver will ever admit that all trains are inflatable
16 Apr 2023
Strumpets! STRUMPETS! Jimmy asks What is the best way to jump on a fast moving train? I always wanted to try this! My answer It's a well-kept secret that all trains are inflatable and...
Whimsy
If the northern coast of Australia is tropical, why don't more people live there?
16 Apr 2023
Image source: I figured googling “tropical hell” would produce something neat, and as you can see it totally did - but turns out it’s also a game. It just wouldn’t be cricket if I nicked ...
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